In this post I will attempt to explain the stream of
thoughts that ran through my head the other morning regarding relationships
(all kinds: friendships, love interests and marriages, business relationships,
etc.) which should allow each of us to better prepare for future relationships
as well as improve existing ones. Don’t worry, it isn’t as boring as it
sounds…I hope. I’ll do my best to be entertaining as well as informative and
enlightening.
1.
You must be willing to be hurt by others,
because they will hurt you at some point.
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We have all been hurt by those we care about. It
may or may not have been an awful thing that was done to us but we were hurt
emotionally, mentally, socially, financially, or otherwise. But because we care
for these people we forgive them, most of the time. It is inevitable that we
will experience some form of pain inflicted by each of those we care about
because we care about them. They may even do something to themselves (drug
abuse, alcohol abuse, anorexia, bulimia, getting involved in relationships that
we know are not safe, etc.) but that which we do to ourselves not only affects
us but also those who care about us.
2.
You must be willing TO hurt others, because you
will.
-
As stated above it is inevitable. We will be
blinded by love and be consumed by things of this world or even by ourselves
and will forget about those around us who care. We may feel they are only
thinking of themselves and not our own needs. This way of thinking on our part
will cause those who care about us pain and suffering to some extent. We must
realize that by developing a relationship with others we make them vulnerable
to the results of our decisions. That which we do may affect them in some way.
Cause and effect.
3.
You must be willing to be vulnerable when
necessary.
-
As I noted in the previous point once we develop
a relationship with someone we ourselves become vulnerable to the consequences
of their decisions and actions. Of course not all actions on another’s part
will affect us each time but I am speaking in generalities.
4.
You must be willing to listen, even when you’re
upset/mad/furious and don’t want to.
-
This is a very difficult thing to do but we must
consciously think about this in the moment that we are upset and control
ourselves. We will not always be successful in doing this but as long as we are
trying and working on improving ourselves it will get better and better. Listening
and trying to understand is the cornerstone of all relationships in my opinion.
5.
You must be willing to compromise when
necessary.
-
Another very important concept in every
relationship whether personal or professional is that of compromise. If
everyone had to get their way every time then no one would work together.
Compromise is not necessarily giving in to the wishes of someone else.
Compromise is showing your character as a person and your willingness to work
with others to accomplish a common goal. It also shows that you care about the
relationship with that other person and are willing to make sacrifices. That’s
not to say that you should be the only one making compromises. That would lead
to resentment and could potentially lead to lowered self-respect and sense of
self-worth.
For those of you who read this, I hope you will be
challenged to think about the topics I present and care enough to comment. I
would like for this plot of Internet where I have staked my claim to become an
interactive piece of the massive creature that is the World Wide Web. I do have
several other areas within the Internet. In my previous post, published on 11
March 2012, I listed several of them for those who would like to continue to
get to know me in my various settings (I will include links to them again at
the end of this post.). As I said in that post, I, along with most everyone
else, have many sides and depending upon the setting I will show a certain
side. Therefore, in order to really get to know me one must follow me around
the Internet and see how I conduct myself, the thoughts I choose to share, and
the questions I pose to those who may be listening/reading what I have put out
there for all to consider.
That being said, I have follow-up thoughts to my previous
post. Being that I am human and need to gain the attention of others in order
to feel a sense of worth and being, I encourage all who read this to comment on
all my posts, my videos on YouTube, and go to the website I created for the
sole purpose of helping others for no reason in particular. Subscribe to my
blog, YouTube channels, and become a member of my website and share these with
your friends and family. A community can be built through these and we could do
great things.
My Website: http://www.myneedynation.com
My Main Channel “The Bjorn Theory”: http://www.youtube.com/thebjorntheory
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/ethanpariseau
In any relationship communication is very important. We have all these ways to communicate with each other, and yet there's still a big lack of communication. I'm one that doesn't want to talk about a problem when I'm mad and upset because I'll say things that I may not have said if I wait till I calm down and think about things. I speak first and think later and that's caused problems in a couple of my relationships.
ReplyDeleteEveryone has their own way of dealing with difficult situations. I'm one who likes to calm down and look at the different aspects of the problem. Unfortunately for me though my wife need s time to cool down.
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